Happy Poetry Month Again!

Yes, it's April, and in the spring a (not-so-) young man's thoughts turn to... writing a poem a day!  This year I'm doing something different. I will try to keep up with Robert Brewer's Poetic Asides Poem-a-Day Challenge, as I always do, but more importantly, I am participating in Tiferet Journal's "Poem-a-thon", another daily poem challenge which is being run as a fund-raiser for the non-profit journal. Tiferet's mission is to convey a sense of spirituality (of any persuasion) through its poetry and prose. It's a highly-regarded journal that I admire (even though they haven't published me - yet), and I'm glad to help out. What I'm asking of my friends and family is to visit the Poem-a-thon page, find my bio, and click to make a donation. I suggest a contribution of $5 or more, which goes directly to the journal, and which will inspire me to write daily. I won't be posting poems here daily as i have done in past years; instead, you can read the poems I produced so far by clicking my name on the Poem-a-thon bio page, Thanks for your help!

Finally, my chapbook, Hits and Sacrifices, is out! I got my author's shipment about a week and a half ago, and to those of you who have pre-ordered it and have waited since early January, I have been assured that your copies are in the mail and should be arriving any time now. If you haven't ordered one yet, you can get it directly from Finishing Line Press or on Amazon.com.

I'm glad that April is here to rekindle my poetic production, nut I really need to start submitting more again. My third of three poems written for the Steve McCurry exhibit at the Hickory Art Museum in NC has been presented and put up with the photo that inspired it. The poem is called "Holi Day", and it may eventually end  up on the museum's website, just as my previous poem "The Yemeni Woman Votes" has been posted there.

I've been assisting my wife with a one-day conference for social workers that she has helped organize. She asked me to do a poetry workshop on gratitude, and I had some fair success leading two sessions. I'll be doing it again this week. I'm also looking at the possibility of doing a regular workshop at a local coffee house

Easter was a whirlwind of preparation and entertaining, and spring arrived here very early - my flowering trees (and everyone else's too) are about two or three weeks ahead of time. I saw my first robin of spring in February. (Global warming?)  My youngest son is in Japan for a semester of exchange study, and he is enjoying it immensely.

Poem: I think I'll share one of the poems I wrote for the Poetic Asides challenge:

Fool's Snow

Waking this morning to wind at my window

I rise to see white flakes whipping past.

I am shocked - snow in April? - but then realize

they are petals from my cherry tree

stripped from their blossoms to ride the air.

The cherries have bloomed weeks ahead

of what we consider their schedule,

thus all but ruining cherry tree festivals

all around the region.  I saw the first

robin of spring in February.

There is madness in the weather these days,

and Nature doesn't give a damn

about our preconceptions. If we do nothing,

predictions will be obsolete, and we fools

will be stripped from our trees in the wind.

Poetry Update: Chapbook, Marge Piercy, Haiku, etc.

It's way past time to update the old blog, especially since I've directed a few new poetry friends to check it out. So here are some updates and news:

1. My chapbook, Hits and Sacrifices, is still pending publication - the original release date was January 8 but was pushed back by Finishing Line Press due to some printer problems, and I suspect a backlog of publication jobs. A few fellow poets have told me they have also experienced delays recently. I did get final galleys just today, but they still need a couple of minor corrections. I'm hoping now that the book will be out to coincide with baseball's Opening Day.

2. I recently signed up for, and was accepted for, an intensive three-day workshop with Marge Piercy this October in Cape Cod. This will be the second time I've had the opportunity to work with Marge - I took a week-long workshop with her back in the summer of 2012. She's a great teacher and a fascinating woman, so I'm looking forward to it.

3. Not much going on submission-wise, partly due to my own laziness.  I'm waiting to hear from my friends Nancy Posey and Jane Shlensky to see if any of my three poems submitted will appear in their planned anthology of narrative poetry, The Well-Versed Reader.  

4. I didn't make the cut this year for the Poetic Asides Poem-a-day Challenge anthology, Poem Your Heart Out, even though I did get a poem in last year's edition.  I did have four poems make the daily list of top 10 finalists, though, and a few friends also made it into the book, like my aforementioned friends Nancy and Jane, as well as Joseph Harker.  Oh well, at least now I can shop my better poems from that month elsewhere.

5. I mentioned in a previous blog entry that three of my poems that were accepted by the Art of Poetry project at the Hickory (NC) Art Museum. Here's a link to their website which features one of the three poems and the photo that inspired it. I was unable to make the live event, but my friend Nancy Posey read the poem for me. I was also happy when I sent a copy of that poem to my friend and mentor Jane Hirshfield, and she loved it.

6. I have been writing a haiku a day this month for National Haiku Writing Month (NaHaiWriMo), and participating on a Facebook page run by haiku poet Michael Dylan Welsh. He gives us daily word prompts and has been running through the alphabet (a letter each month). This month's letter is Z, which makes for some intriguing word prompts. I'll post a few examples of mine below.

7. I've been invited to participate as a featured poet at this year's Collingswood Book Festival here in NJ in October. It's a one-day street fair (weather permitting) that features local, regional and national authors and poets, booksellers, kid's activities, and so forth, and is always a great day out. This year's headliner is Gregory Pardlo, recent Pulitzer Prize-winning poet and South Jersey native.  There's a "poetry tent" that offers poetry-related activities all day, and I will be part of a group who will be reading poetry about baseball.  (My chapbook should be out be then!)  Here's a link if you want to know more about it. (Last year's events still appear there, but they give you an idea of what it's all about. Last year's special guest was Matthew Quick, who is another South Jersey native, and the author of Silver Linings Playbook.)

As promised, here are some samples of the haiku/senryu I have written this month:

[Feb. 2 prompt: zazen]

melting snow

forms fog on the hill -

morning trance


[Feb. 7 prompt: zenith]

wolves

sniff in brightly-lit snow -

hunger moon

[Feb. 11 prompt: zest]

grating lemon zest

for the cake icing -

her smile

[Feb. 12 prompt: zeugma]

icy morning -

my plans frozen

with the car door lock


[Feb. 15 prompt: zinfandel]

my respect for you -
like a wine connoisseur
for white zinfandel

[Feb. 22 prompt: zodiac]

you the lion

versus me the bull -

we make it work

[Feb. 26 prompt: zucchini]

neighborhood gardens -

there's always someone who brings

surplus zucchini

Favorite Music of 2015

I post at least one list of favorite songs and/or albums about this time each year, and this year is no exception. However, I must admit I have been a bit underwhelmed by the year in music. Maybe it's because my listening habits have changed - I don't seem to be listening to as much new music these days, but most of what I've heard just hasn't bowled me over. That said, there are still some worthwhile albums to list in a top 10 for the year:

1. Alabama Shakes - Sound and Color: Brittany Howard is a force of nature - what a voice! Their sophomore album is just as impressive as their debut, with several great bluesy, soulful songs like  the title track, "Don't Wanna Fight", and "Gimme All Your Love".

2. Kurt Vile - b'lieve i'm goin' down: A favorite native son (Philly) and former War on Drugs member is carving an impressive solo career, and this year's album has a lot of catchy, quirky pop-rock, especially the propulsive "Pretty Pimpin'", quite possibly the best song of the year.

3. Richard Thompson - Still: He's become the elder statesman of British folk-rock, and still writes some of the best, albeit dark, lyrics in music. He also can still play a mean guitar. You can always rely on a quality release from Mr. Thompson, and this is no exception. Highlights: "Beatnik Walk", "All Buttoned Up", and "Guitar Heroes" (in which he imitated the styles of several of his guitar influences). (Get the deluxe edition with an extra CD of five songs.)

4. Los Lobos  - Gates of Gold: It was great to see this venerable East LA roots-rock band nominated for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame this year. They didn't get in, but they can still grind out some dynamite rock and are not afraid to take chances creatively,.while remaining true to their roots. Highlight: "Made to Break Your Heart"

5. Adele - 25: I listen to precious little mainstream pop, but this Brit impresses me every time. This album is a bit more mellow and darker than her previous smash, 21, but there's a maturity in her voice and writing that really pulls you in. "Hello" is shaping up to be the Song of the Year.

6. Decemberists - What a Beautiful World, What a Terrible World - Another dependable band whose new work I always eagerly await. Colin Meloy's bookish lyrics are intriguing and the music is impressive, as usual, and even if this may not rank among their very best albums, it still has some satisfying tunes, like "Make You Better" and "The Wrong Year". Also, look for their EP from this year, Florasongs.

7. Public Service Broadcasting - The Race for Space: The first of two rather unique albums on my list - this UK electro-rock band has taken recorded material from the US/USSR space race from the 1950's and 1960's and created a captivating soundtrack around it. It's a brilliant concept with striking results. from the peppy "Go!" to the haunting "Fire in the Cockpit" (about the tragic fire in Apollo 1).

8. Africa Express - Terry Riley in C Mali: In C was the seminal work of American minimalist music, and here it gets a unique treatment, featuring Brian Eno and others with a troupe of African musicians. The piece, written 50 years ago, was always a rhythmic masterpiece, but with new instrumental and vocal interpretations, it's practically re-invented. The best world music I've heard this year.

9. Viet Cong - Viet Cong: Dark, menacing hard rock doesn't usually appeal to me, but this Canadian band does it brilliantly.  The murky sonics enhance the effect of pulling you down and in. Ironically, I don't find this album depressing at all, but exhiliarting.

10. Wilco - Star Wars: Count on Wilco to produce an entertaining and challenging collection of songs, and this one was even offered as a free MP3 album earlier in the year. Some favorites: "Random Name Generator", "You Satellite".

Honorable Mentions:

The Arcs - Yours, Dreamily

Gary Clark Jr. - The Story of Sonny Boy Slim

Tame Impala - Currents

James Taylor - Before This World

Father John Misty - I Love You, Honeybear

Sufjan Stevens - Carrie and Lowell

Bjork - Vulnicura

Panda Bear - Panda Bear Meets the Grim Reaper

Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings - It's a Holiday Soul Party
Bob Dylan - The Cutting Edge 1965-1966: The Bootleg Series Vol. 12
Drive-by Truckers - It's Great to Be Alive!

Stee-phen! Stee-phen! Stee-phen!

Three months is too long even for an occasional blog.  I've been in a major creative drought for months now, but I still have some poetry news to report:

1. My new chapbook, Hits and Sacrifices, will have a full first printing.  Thanks to everyone who supported me by buying a preorder copy (or two or more!). The publisher's timeline is behind, and I haven't got the galleys yet, so the original publication date of January 8 looks increasingly unlikely.  I hope to see the first copies go out sometimes by late January or early February - at least that's my guess.

2. I mentioned in my prior blog post that I was entering a contest sponsored by the Hickory (NC) Museum of Art, inviting poets to write poetry inspired by any of the works in their museum. I wrote three short poems about three photographs by National Geographic photographer Steve McCurry from his temporary exhibit there, and the curators picked all three to be featured in their upcoming quarterly Art of Poetry presentation, which is a walking tour of the museum and reading of the poems. They will also be posted next to the photos. I won't be able to attend the reading (which is actually today, Dec. 12) but I'm very honored. If the poems are posted on their website I'll share them.

I just got back from a great mini-vacation in New York, where we visited our two sons who live there, as well as doing a little Christmas shopping and decoration-gazing. We admired the Rockefeller Center tree and the gorgeous baroque-angel tree at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, took in views of the city from the Empire State Building and our nice timeshare unit on the 25th floor of a midtown resort hotel.  But the highlight of this trip was getting to be an audience member on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.

I was lucky enough to snag two tickets online about a week or so before we went, but that was no guarantee of admission because they always overbook to make sure all the seats are filled. So we had to get in line early to be sure to get in. We arrived a little after noon and ended up ninth and tenth in line. At two o'clock a production assistant came out to check our tickets and ID, then gave us numbers, stamped our hands, and told us to come back around 3:45 to get back in line to go into the theater. Our numbers got us front-row center seats.

There was a warmup comedian, Paul Mercurio, who was very funny, pulling folks out of the audience and asking them questions, and pumping up the audience to get them to cheer and laugh as loudly as possible once Stephen arrived. (The Ed Sullivan Theater actually seats less than 300 people, so I guess they want us to sound like a crowd twice as big.) Stephen himself came on shortly before taping for a brief Q&A session with the audience - he seems like a pretty nice guy. Then the house band, Jon Batiste and Stay Human, started to crank it up. Oh man, can they cook!  They just might be the best house band on the planet. (Sorry, Roots.) They really got the audience psyched up with their exuberant New Orleans-style jazz - you only get to see a small portion of their performances on TV.  Then Stephen came on, and of course the crowd went wild.

The show, taped and broadcast on Tuesday, December 8, featured French actress Marion Cotillard, author George Saunders, and singer-songwriter-harpist Joanna Newsom.  Stephen also did a funny bit involving defending a Turkish doctor who was arrested for physically comparing his president on social media to Gollum from Lord of the Rings. Stephen (who is a huge Tolkeinophile) presented his defense of the doctor in the guise of Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird. Later, he went on a rant about the misshapen Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Christmas Trees, but then shifted gears and complained about a single light bulb that burned out on his marquee outside, so he feigned going outside to change it. (That bit was cut from the Tuesday show and shown on Wednesday instead.)

We slightly regretted that we didn't try to get tickets instead for the Wednesday show, which featured cast members from Downton Abbey (we are both big fans), but the guests for Tuesday were good. Marion Cotillard looked a bit uncomfortable and hemmed and hawed during the early part of the interview (part of which was edited out), but she warmed up to Stephen by the end, and they did a cute bit about how even the most mundane things in English sound so romantic in French.  George Saunders (with whose work I wasn't familiar) was very engaging, talking about the writing process and singing an amusing song he wrote, accompanying himself on guitar. (He had one of the funniest lines of the night, saying that playing his guitar in front of Stephen's band was "like having sex in front of porn stars".) Joanna Newsom was interesting - she is a good harpist and songwriter, and she had a good band, but I have a hard time with her quirky, affected voice. And at the end, George Saunders, who recently released a children's book,  read a bedtime story to Stephen, who was all tucked into bed with a nightcap (the hat, that is) and a teddy bear.  

The taping was efficient and well-rehearsed, and took only about an hour and a half for the one-hour show.  (Most of the few short delays were for costume changes, waiting for the guests, and conferences with the production staff.) I noticed, watching the broadcast later, that there is some minor editing of the interviews and other show banter, but the only major edit was the bit I mentioned before that they saved for the following night. They did censor a conversation between Marion and Stephen about why the French say  "merde" ("shit") for good luck before a theater performance - they not only deleted the word in both languages but also whited out their mouths.  In any event, it was a great way to spend an evening and part of our vacation.

Poem: How about a silly verse about a recent seasonal "controversy"?

Seeing Red

Red cup, red cup, what have you wrought?

You're a scandal each time Starbucks coffee is bought!

Some say you're proof holiday spirit is listless,

just another example of the "War on Christmas".

No snowflakes or snowmen or reindeer so nimble,

in fact not one single darned holiday symbol!

There's talk of a boycott by no less than Trump,

that billionaire candidate and Grinchy-faced grump.

You've divided our nation with this heathen display

that houses the tall chestnut praline latte!

A Starbucks green logo with plain red field behind -

wait, green on red? Good enough - never mind....

New Book News, and Hanging with Southern Writers

First things first: The pre-order period for my new chapbook, Hits and Sacrifices, has begun!  From now till Nov. 13 you can pre-order my book from Finishing Line Press for $12.49 plus shipping.  Every copy pre-ordered helps me get closer to the pre-sale goal of 55 copies, which will assure a full first printing. Please help support your favorite poet! (Okay, maybe I'm your second or third or 10th favorite poet, but please support my book anyway.) Click here to order from the publisher's website.

Second, I just wrapped up a wonderful weekend in Hickory, NC, attending the Fall Face-to-Face in the Foothills, as mentioned in my previous post. It was ostensibly a gathering of poets active on Robert Brewer's Poetic Asides blog, organized by two of the group's members, Nancy Posey and Jane Shlensky. (There were six of us members attending altogether.) It was a small conference of about 20 attendees, but the two days were packed with guest speakers giving seminars and workshops, including Robert himself, and three current and former Poets Laureate of North Carolina. It was a unique experience meeting and working with almost exclusively Southern writers.  (We did have attendees from Colorado and Alberta, Canada.) Hickory is a large town with lots of culture going on, including a beautiful art museum which was the venue for the conference. They currently have an impressive exhibit of photography by Steve McCurry (the National Geographic photographer who took that iconic photograph of the Afghan girl in the 1980's). Poets are invited to write about an art work that inspires them and submit their poetry, and if the directors like the poem, it is displayed next to the work and read aloud (by the poet, if possible) at a special quarterly art walk presentation. I plan to send them at least three poems inspired by the McCurry photos. We also had an open mic reading at Taste Full Beans, a great coffee house in town that has music, art and poetry regularly and is owned by a local poet, Scott Owens. (They provided us with coffee and lunch, too.) It was a 9-hour drive to get to Hickory, but it was worth every mile. Oh yeah, and I wrote four poems and cold eight of my previous chapbooks. Thanks to Nancy, Jane, Robert, Scott, The Hickory Museum of Art, and everyone else involved in making the conference a big success.

Poem: Here is one I just wrote about a very scary experience on the way to the conference, on the interstate in Baltimore.  This was for the weekly Poetic Asides prompt to write a "hesitation" poem.

He Who Hesitates is Lost 

I am minding my own business on the interstate,

doing 65 in the middle lane, when out of nowhere,

or more specifically, the merging lane, a pickup truck

careens out of control right at me. Instinctively,

I swerve to the left lane on the sparsely-traveled highway

to avoid a certain terrible crash. He misses me

by no more than ten feet, then somehow

wrestles his truck back under control

and drives off as if nothing has happened. All I know

is if I froze, even for a second, this would have had

a much different outcome. I thank my reflexes,

still quick enough, I guess, or my guardian angel,

if there is such a thing, because otherwise

neither this poem nor I would exist.

I Heart New York

About time for some updates, I suppose. It's been a busy summer, and one of the big highlights was my retirement from the Federal government in early July. I got a nice send-off in the form of a luncheon at work, organized my work friends and my family, and I got my first pension check this month. This is not to say I've spent the summer in a hammock with a Corona Light in hand. I have gone back to work part-time for a local attorney, and I've been devoting more time to helping my wife take care of our 2-year-old granddaughter, who is growing up before our eyes.  (Lately she has been declaring things that she likes as "pretty awesome".)  There are still plenty of projects to tackle at home, but finding the time to do them is still not easy.  The end of August promises to be rather hectic, with our former international student returning from Korea and getting ready for college, our new international student arriving from China on the same day, and our youngest son shipping off for his sophomore year of college the following day.

Despite all that, the two of us managed to take a mini-vacation to the Hudson River Valley of New York for four days and three nights.  She's been there before, but this is my first trip, and I loved it. We crammed a lot into those four days, touring many of the local historic homes and sites. We spent the first two nights in the Hyde Park area and visited all three of the Roosevelt homes: Springwood (the family home), Val-Kill (Eleanor's home), and Top Cottage (FDR's retreat).  The homes and museums only reinforced our opinions of what exceptional people Franklin and Eleanor were. Their homes were all fascinating in their own way, but for over-the-top decadence, they were no match for their neighbors, the Vanderbilts, who owned a mansion up the road that cost $2.5 million to build - around 1900!  After Hyde Park, we spent two days at Tarrytown, where we visited Sunnyside, the Washington Irving home.  Irving, we learned, was quite the superstar in his day, and the first American writer to be accepted worldwide as a "man of letters". We also saw Kykuit, the Rockefeller estate (last inhabited by Gov. Nelson Rockefeller). The Rockefellers were known as philanthropists and patrons of the arts, and it shows both inside and outside the mansion. Nelson was a fan of ancient Chinese artifacts as well as modern art, and there are dozens of unique pieces to be seen, including a series of  tapestry reproductions of Picasso works that he commissioned from Picasso himself.  Finally, we visited the nearby Union Church, which boasts beautiful stained glass windows by Marc Chagall and Henri Matisse.  The weather for all four days was perfect, the views and scenery were beautiful, and our tour guides were, without exception, excellent. The only thing we regret is that we couldn't eat at the Culinary Institute of America, which is apparently closed in August.  If you're interested in some photos from the trip, you can find them on my Facebook page.

Time now for a few poetry updates:

1. I submitted my final manuscript draft for Hits and Sacrifices to Finishing Line Press.  The pre-order sales period will begin in September, so you will be hearing more about it soon.

2. I am the featured poet for the latest issue of Chantarelle's Notebook. You can read the issue, including my five poems, here.

3. My poem "Shelter" has been accepted by US 1 Worksheets for their next issue, due next spring.

4. My poem "Backbreaking Mountain" placed 2nd in the Poetic Asides Poetic Form Challenge. It's in a form called a "dodoitsu" - a Japanese poem of 4 lines with syllable counts of 7-7-7-5, usually on a theme of love or work. Blogmaster Robert Brewer says he may publish the top three winners in his column in a future issue of Writer's Digest.

5. The early results of this year's Poem-a-Day Challenge from Poetic Asides are out - only four days' results have been announced so far, but my poem "The Man Peeling Yams on Easter Morning" made the top 10 finalists for Day 5.  As with last year's contest, the final winner for each of the 30 days of April will be published in an upcoming anthology.  So, fingers crossed!

6. Speaking of Poetic Asides, a couple of the regular blog site members, Nancy Posey and Jane Shlensky,  are organizing a two-day poetry conference in Hickory, NC in September, called "Fall Face-to-Face in the Foothills".  It's a chance to meet with several fellow Poetic Asides participants (including blogmaster Robert Lee Brewer) and enjoy sharing poetic activities. Although it's a nine-hour drive for me, I plan to go and I look forward to meeting a number of online friends in person.

Baseball:  My Phillies had the worst first half in the history of the team, going into the All-Star break at 29-62, a truly dismal record. Since then, they have really turned things around, winning 15 of their last 20 games. Part of the credit has to go to interim manager Pete MacKanin, but also Ryan Howard's resurgence at the plate, and talented rookies like Mikael Franco and Aaron Nola, might have something to do with it too. They have a big hole to dig out of to even finish at .500 for the year, but right now they have become fun to watch again. We had to say goodbye to Cole Hamels, who is the only pitcher in MLB history to be traded just after pitching a no-hitter.  He's now a Texas Ranger, but he's a classy guy and a possible future Hall-of-Famer. I wish him a lot of luck.

Poem:  Here's the dodoitsu finalist that I mentioned above:

Backbreaking Mountain

Workaday world, I can't say

goodbye yet.  Like that cowboy

in that movie, I wish I

knew how to quit you.

A Busy June and Publication News

June is turning out to be one busy month. It started on the 1st with the senior prom at my international student's school. She chose not to go, but her best friend did - with my youngest son, who gallantly escorted her. They made a cute couple and had a really good time. We got some nice pictures, some of which included my granddaughter. Here's a sample - you can find more on my Facebook page. (Note: the photo with the umbrella is courtesy of courierpostonline.com.)

Then right on the heels of prom was high school graduation - our student and her friend both graduated and are headed back home to Asia for the summer. (No photos because our student is notoriously camera-shy.) They'll both be back to attend college here in the fall - our student will be attending nearby Rutgers so we hope to still see her often.  In the three years she's been with us, she has really bonded with the family, and we will miss her as a member of the household.  Heck, that's an understatement - she's been like a daughter to us and we love her a lot.

My son will be returning to Boy Scout camp this summer for his second year as an adult counselor, teaching "adventure sports" like rock climbing and mountain biking - he's really in his element there.
Later this month we will have a family member recuperating at our home after surgery, and I am preparing for a big rite of passage: retirement!  As of this writing, I have 14 working days left. Like I said, this is a big month.

In poetry news, I just got word from Finishing Line Press that they have accepted my chapbook manuscript of baseball poems, tentatively titled "Hits and Sacrifices". I hope to have it out by the end of this year - more news as it becomes available. I've already started to solicit "blurbs" for the cover, including a famous poet I've worked with, but he politely declined.

How about a poem?  This is one I wrote in May, in response to one of Robert Brewer's weekly prompts on Poetic Asides. I decided to follow Jane Hirshfield's example from her new book, and title a series of poems entitled "My  _______," using the key word from each of Robert's prompts in May,

My Childhood

I won’t bore you with the details –
it was just a normal life.

Well, there was the time
I was abducted by aliens –
no, they didn’t probe me;
they just gave me ice cream.

I was in a war, too, and I took the hill
for our side. Yes, I died a few times,
but a minute later I’d jump up,
a marvelous resurrection.

And I’ll never forget the day
I walked on the moon.
You can still see my sneaker prints
in the undisturbed dust.

Then there was the Indy 500,
where I lapped the competition.
and the Kentucky Derby
which I won by a nose.

Oh yeah, and I almost forgot
that walk-off home run I hit
in the bottom of the ninth to win
the World Series for the Phillies.

Like I said, a normal childhood.