PAD Day 12: How the Mighty

 I'm late writing and posting for Day 12, because of a day-long road trip that was literally an entire day of travel. But here are today's prompts:

WBP: Write a "funny" poem.

NPWM: Write a "tall tale" poem.

PSH: "Write a poem describing the way back home from a trip using public transport (bus, train, plane)...." (Amin Jack Pędziwiater)

The last prompt had more to it, like providing more personal details of one's journey, both inner and outer impressions, but I didn't focus on that because it didn't fit into the tone or purpose of the poem that was gelling in my head. As far as the "funny" element, well, it's more satirical, but I guess that counts.

Mr. Larger-than-Life

Mr. Larger-than-Life caught a train 

with his bare hands
to return to his home town.
He watched the trees whiz by his window,
and grabbed a few,
like toilet brushes in his hands.
He thought about how kind he had been
to all the little people,
how he kept them in a shoebox
and fed and watered them regularly.
 
When he arrived at the station,
and put the train down,
he received a hero’s welcome.
They had a huge reception at the civic auditorium,
just big enough to accommodate his head.
Everyone wore red hats that said,
“I Want to Be Larger-than-Life.”
They gave him the key to the city
which he slipped into his pocket
next to his key to success
and several of the Florida Keys.
He gave a speech about how he built this city
with Legos when he was four,
and how the only way to be as big as him
was to be him.
 
Everyone swooned in his presence or fainted
or shouted until their throats were sore,
until that article in the Daily News,
the first of many to cut him down to size.