PAD Day 15: A Hockey Game Broke Out

 Today's dual prompts from NaPoWriMo and Write Better Poetry: (1) Write about something you have absolutely no interest in, and (2) write a "patience" poem (which can be about patience or the lack thereof). These two prompts seem to fit well together, because generally speaking, we have little patience with things that don't interest us. Here's my take:

Not a Fan
 
I went to a fight the other night,
and a hockey game broke out.
―Rodney Dangerfield
 
I'm not the most rabid sports fan,
but I do love my baseball,
and I root every year for the Phillies,
like Harper, Realmuto, Nola.
There's nothing like your ace
striking out the side, or your power hitter
clouting a walk-off homer.
 
I'll sit and watch football with you,
especially if the Eagles are on,
but don't get annoyed if I ask
a few questions―I'm still hazy
about some of the rules.
 
I can't watch a whole basketball game.
I find all that back-and-forth tedious,
but I will watch the 76ers highlights,
Embiid with his seismic dunks,
Harden with his step-back threes.
 
I have no patience for hockey, though―
no interest in street fighters on ice,
scrapping with gloves thrown down,
jerseys pulled up, knocking out
what few teeth they have left
after encounters with pucks and sticks.
Back in the day they called the Flyers
"The Broad Street Bullies"―
I remember Bobby Clarke's toothless grin.
They were the perfect fit for Philly,
a classic blue-collar town, home of fans
who threw snowballs at Santa
during an Eagles game.
 
But I get it―different strokes and all.
Give me a day at Citizens Bank Park any time,
even though to the average hockey fan,
baseball is as exciting as, literally,
watching grass grow.